The early death of a parent, particularly to a devastating disease like ALS, brings up a host of challenges for children left behind. In my case, losing my father to ALS on Christmas Day 2020 was a profound and life-altering event. His death was filled with premature endings, complex grief, and bittersweet relief as my father's suffering finally came to an end.
For four years, our family witnessed the relentless progression of ALS strip away my dad's abilities, dignity, and quality of life. The unstoppable progression of this condition took a devastating toll on our family. Financially, this slow and expensive diagnosis drained almost all of my father's insurance. After his death, the small remainder was placed in an account that will support my mother's future retirement. However, in the years after my dad's death, us children were left with no financial support. This greatly impacted our healing journey and has made financing my post-secondary education particularly difficult. While I am forever grateful for the small amount of life insurance my father had, having a more comprehensive insurance plan would have allowed my family to focus on rebuilding our lives, instead of financial insecurity, after such an unimaginable loss.
As I reflect on this experience, I am reminded of the resilience and strength that emerged within me in the face of ALS. When my father was diagnosed in my grade 11 year, I had to abandon a full-ride athletic scholarship to an American university to stay home to help care for dad. My mother was also forced to leave her job and become a full-time caregiver during his decline. The loss of both parents' incomes for years stressed our already fragile finances; traveling to ALS specialists, paying out-of-pocket for medical equipment, and navigating day-to-day expenses became overwhelming.
My pain in losing a parent is not unique. However, being a caregiver to my father during his battle with ALS shaped my life's passion: to help others navigate their most difficult moments. Working two part-time jobs while studying full-time, I put myself through a Bachelor of Social Work degree and am now pursuing my Master of Social Work. Upon graduation, I aspire to work as a counsellor in palliative healthcare. Concurrently, while financial concerns and anxiety about the future persist, I remain hopeful and determined to change my family's financial narrative and build us a stable foundation.
Grief, in its ever-changing nature, serves as a reminder of the deep love I have for my father and the preciousness of life. While the pain of loss will always linger, it also fuels my passion to make a positive impact and support others in their journey through suffering. I am grateful for the lessons learned from my father's legacy and the strength he instilled in me, guiding me towards a purpose-driven life of compassion and service to others. I would be deeply grateful if Manulife's support became the turning point in the story of how I can create positive change.
